For the first time, I didn't finish a race. Yep. No real reason, things weren't going as I had planned and was faced with a decision. Make this work or call it a day. It's easy to bull yourself through races, run hard and sometimes with more stupidity than brains. Today I had a goal to hold back, keep a steady pace and that wasn't happening. The final decision was made when the porta-john line was minutes long. I hopped on a bus and went back to the start. It is what it is. Watching the finishers gave me some touches of wishing I had made a different decision. I started to get annoyed with myself walking to the finish looking for Joe and then decided I was being ridiculous. I choose not to finish, it was a conscious well thought out decision and the right one for me today. So rather than throw a fit, I found a nice sunny spot with other fans and spent a few minutes cheering for those who were on their way to the 2nd half of the marathon course.
All I have to remember is that running is my key to ongoing sanity. Today was a prime example, from the time I woke up till I got out of work things were glum. No reason, my head just wasn't in it today. I felt physically ill and mentally couldn't get out of my own way. Fighting the overwhelming spell my sweat pants have cast on me, I made it to the gym after work. Let's see how it goes. I fully expected to give up after only a mile or 2, I just felt too bad. But to my surprise that run of the mill nothing special 5 miles after work today completely changed my outlook. No longer am I feeling crummy and sounding like Eyeore. The run was slow and lacked any intensity that a coach would like to have seen but for my mental health, it was perfect. I'm now ready to celebrate the weekend, sweatpants are still folded at the bottom of the bed, but I have a few more hours of fun before I need to retreat to them. Sorry guys!
Miles trained today: 5
Days till the Amica Newoport Half: 2
Days till the Harvard Pilgrim Maine Coast Half: 24
My club has been putting on an all women's 5k for the last 3 years and finally I ran out of excuses as to why I couldn't run it. So I shivered at the starting line wondering why I was there. 10 miles yesterday, 3 before the race today, it was going to be ugly. I sat there and watched women around me get ready to run, my music was too loud to hear what was being said but there was an energy that could be felt; a camaraderie that is lacking at other races I have run. The gun went off and we snaked down Elmgrove Ave. Different ages, shapes, speeds, levels of experience but I hate to be so corny but really a sense of oneness. I turned down the Blvd and waited for some men to pass by me and they never came. Towards the end I picked it up, wanting to be done and found myself having a really good time. I would focus on catching up to different women ahead of me an cheer them on as I found my next target. Towards the end we caught up with the walkers and unlike other races where this tends to get nasty, people were nice to each other. It could have been due to the race organization but I think it was more than that. Coming down the track to the finish, the crowd was louder than you find at most races. People were really excited for everyone that was finishing. I stood at the finished and cheered for a while and it was great to watch the smiles on the faces of the finishers. It was chilling to be a part of, again I apologize for the sappiness of this, as I write this I'm suffering from extreme dehydration and not myself. Until today I had not appreciated how nice an all women's running event can be. Sorry guys, but today I enjoyed the competition without your testosterone, too short shorts, spitting and snoting and fuzzy pits! It was just a very nice event and one I was glad I participated in. Going into this I encouraged my non running friends to join and hope that they will think about being a part of it next year.
Miles trained today: 6
Days till the Newport Half Marathon: 13
Days till the Harvard Pilgrim Maine Coast Half Marathon: 35
Heading out for 10, I intentionally left the garmin at home. I just didn't need the pressure. Although the fact that I perceive pressure from an inanimate object is a bit of a problem. We don't have time to discuss those types of problems! Little did I know what a difference it would be. For the whole 10 miles I was relaxed. Never knowing my speed or distance was nice. KNowing the route, gave me a ball park figure, but beyond that I was clueless. I can't tell you if my knees started to bother me at mile 7, or if I pooped out come mile 9. It helped that it was a beautiful morning to be out there, and I had some good company. Today I enjoyed the conversation and found myself laughing later in the run. I know I ran 10 today and that's all that really matters. I will have other workouts to gauge my pace and measure splits.